Welcome to the 300th post on this blog, and the last of the year-end reflections. I posted about writing and blogging. Today I will try to write about my life in general. 2014 had some highlights, but the last few weeks put life’s fragility front and centre. On December 9th, after dealing with a stroke, a co-worker passed away at the age of 60. I can’t write those words without feeling emotional.
We live our lives usually with the following phrase ‘When I (blank) I will (blank)’. When I lose weight, I will be happy. When I worked enough, I will retire comfortably. When I get a particular education credential, I will get a really good job. I can go on. (Feel free to add a few of your own in the comments.) Around this time, people begin their New Year’s resolutions. I always like setting goals; They have steps to reaching those accomplishments, and they usually have deadlines. I can work with it. Writing and blogging lend themselves to goal setting. Life lends itself to serious reflection, the kind reminding me I have a finite time on this earth. How will I live it?
I keep circling back to a piece of advice given to me by someone in my last job. “Fatima,” she advised “Trust yourself.” If I have one resolution for 2015, it’s to trust myself a little more. In fact I would say this phrase trust myself like my life depended on it. It’s not easy to trust oneself. We step out with our blogs, YouTube channels, or our very lives, and someone will sniff asking, “Who do you think you are?”
Remember, these people are not owed a response of any kind. Nada.
Now my life does depend on it. In this case it’s not just about breathing. It’s about looking at the quality of my life. What will I spend time on? Will I devote energy to a particular issue in my life? Will I leave something positive behind? Those are the big questions leading to even bigger questions. Those are my New Year’s resolutions.
I can’t leave this reflection without saying thanks. Thanks to the blog readers. Thank you to those encouraging me in what I pursuit. Thank you 2014 and the lessons you taught me.