This is me on any given day, never mind bedtime:
People’s advice to ‘get out of my head’ sounds easy, but it’s hard. Nobody says ‘here are some ways to do it’ leaving me to find ways to overthink less and do more. Enter Headspace.
I read about Andy Puddicombe and Headspace in a book, I think it’s The Beauty of Discomfort by Amanda Lange, and something made the dim light bulb in my brain flicker a little brighter. It’s not a swipe at myself, my mind felt dimmed, and my soul took a beating in December. After trying things like contemplative prayer and Lectio Devina, a meditation app had better portability. Plus, I had nothing to lose by trying the ten sessions available in the free version.
After a few weeks, I made the leap to a subscription with two or three days missed in between, but I kept at it. I sat with everything and returned to the breath. I sat with existential questions, counted breaths up to ten and started again at one. I sat at my desk at work, put my earphones in over lunch, took warm-up breaths through the nose and out through the mouth before closing my eyes. The goal isn’t to space out but to allow the mists in my head to dissipate and see the figures darting around a little more clearly. Another, less poetic way, of putting it-I want the hamster in my head to take a coffee break for more than five minutes. Until somebody figures out how to make a pensieve from Harry Potter, the Headspace app will have to do.